isc_task_pause/unpause were inherently thread-unsafe - a task
could be paused only once by one thread, if the task was running
while we paused it it led to races. Fix it by making sure that
the task will pause if requested to, and by using a 'pause reference
counter' to count task pause requests - a task will be unpaused
iff all threads unpause it.

Don't remove from queue when pausing task - we lock the queue lock
(expensive), while it's unlikely that the task will be running -
and we'll remove it anyway in dispatcher