Remove taskmgr->excl_lock, fix the locking for taskmgr->exiting

While doing code review, it was found that the taskmgr->exiting is set
under taskmgr->lock, but accessed under taskmgr->excl_lock in the

Additionally, before the change that moved running the tasks to the
netmgr, the task_ready() subrouting of isc_task_detach() would lock
mgr->lock, requiring the mgr->excl to be protected mgr->excl_lock
to prevent deadlock in the code.  After !4918 has been merged, this is
no longer true, and we can remove taskmgr->excl_lock and use
taskmgr->lock in its stead.

Solve both issues by removing the taskmgr->excl_lock and exclusively use
taskmgr->lock to protect both taskmgr->excl and taskmgr->exiting which
now doesn't need to be atomic_bool, because it's always accessed from
within the locked section.

(cherry picked from commit e705f213)
72 jobs for !5698 with ondrej/fix-taskmgr-exiting-access-v9_16 in 19 minutes and 59 seconds (queued for 47 seconds)
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